It's amazing how quickly emotions can take over and turn a ok day into a not so ok day. Sometimes something so simple, so small can make me lose my footing and the rug is pulled from up under me. Sometimes, a small reminder of my present situation makes me believe that life will always be like this. Sometimes I have to let the tears fall, get overwhelmed and slightly freak out before I come back down from space. Nothing like crying in the stairwell at work to make me come back to Earth. I'm having a day.
Not a bad day. Just a momentary lapse into an emotional abyss. Slowly coming back to the light after letting my Father calm me down. I had every intention of calling someone or texting someone to get me off the ledge, but I couldn't. I needed to be in that moment alone, so I could totally depend on Him to be my comforter. Jehovah Shalom: Lord of Peace. He didn't speak in a booming voice, or even a whisper. I didn't feel His touch on my shoulder. I didn't feel Him anywhere in that stairwell, but I know He was there. He was there just like He always is, waiting for me to just give it all to Him. See, my Father doesn't want me to be upset or overwhelmed. Sometimes when I get caught up in my own emotions or by let the lies of the enemy invade my thoughts, He waits for me to calm down and remember that He takes care of everything. He makes everything glorious, He provides for my needs, He takes care of problems, He moves. I just have to remember that in the midst of my chaos.
This entry started off differently. It started off with me going on and on about what upset me and the history behind it. Think the Holy Spirit shifted gears after my stairwell tear-fest and decided to have me give praise to my Father instead. Sometimes circumstances seem so bleak and overwhelming, but in the midst of it all, we should still remember to praise Him. Rejoice in the midst of the storm. Though the world felt like it was crashing down around me for about 20 minutes, I still must remember that God is not going to put more on me than I can bear. And I have learned over the years that I think I can carry a mighty heavy load and still press forward. So, in this moment, I am good. I can actually smile. My God is good and makes sure that I remember that. The enemy is already defeated and I am victorious.
Thanks Dad. You rock.
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