Thursday, July 29, 2010

He Wants It All

As I am traveling to work after dropping off the baby or on my way home from work, I like to ride in silence. This has been the norm for a few weeks. Before, I would be blasting praise and worship music, giving my Father a little glory. I don't know where the riding in silence came from but I do it more and more often. I think I do it to have a little quiet time to spend pouring my heart out to God, hoping that He is listening.

This morning was no different...well maybe. I had just dropped Aiden off and was sitting at the light when I turned off the radio to start up my morning conversation. For some reason, I didn't know what to say. I had had a pretty crappy day yesterday and wanted to have a half-way decent one today, hence the need to talk to God. But the words wouldn't come, the thought were jumbled. I was a mess. I gave up and turned the radio back on.

I flipped from one station to the next and found nothing suitable. Didn't want to pull out a CD either. I was getting kinda frazzled. In a last ditch effort, I flipped the station one more time and there it was. The song that ignited my heart and lifted my spirits. He Wants It All by forever Jones. I got goose bumps the moment I heard the words and immediately began singing my praises.

There's a voice that cries out in the silence,
searching for heart that will love him,
longing for child that will give him their all,
give it all, he wants it all

And he says, love me, love me with your whole heart
he wants it all today
serve me, serve me with your life now
he wants it all today
bow down, let go of your idols
he wants it all today (x3)
He wants it all

There's a God that walks over the earth,
he's searching for heart that is desperate,
longing for child that will give him their all,
give it all, he wants it all

God was speaking to me this morning in the midst of my confusion and frustration about not knowing what to say to Him. He wants it all today. He wants all of my crazy thoughts, my tears, my heart, my devotion, my love. He just wants to spend time with me today and wants me to desire to spend time with Him. He doesn't want me wasting time bound to idols when He should be the only person getting my attention and admiration. He just wants all of me. All of me.

God is working on me still. He is working on me to help get me to the point where He has all of me. I am almost there. Kinda. Still a work in progress. Still working on falling on my face completely naked and unashamed before Him. But He is patient and still reminds me that He just wants to be my everything. How sweet is that? My Father, the romantic.

He wants it all. He wants me to serve Him with my life. He wants me to be a child that will give Him my all. It's funny how hard it is to let go of everything and let God have it. My impatience tends to keep me wanting to have my hand in what goes on around me. He just wants it all. Let Him have my troubles and allow him to ease my heart and mind.

He wants it all. You win, Father.

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