Saturday, July 9, 2011

For I Know The Plans I Have For You...

One phone call rocked my world tonight. Seriously. God is up to something for real.

Let me set the stage.

I have always loved writing. For as long as I can remember, I have always enjoyed writing. I remember being in elementary school writing poems and short stories. I would spend hours in the library reading Beatrix Potter books and reading about the life of Langston Hughes. Books were the most amazing creations to me. I remember being in 7th grade SPIRIT class (gifted program) and instead of participating in the super cool Odyssey of the Mind competition (which meant out of town trip and time away from school), I opted to do the alternate project: write and illustrate a book. I remember spending weeks perfecting my story and my drawings. I remember watching each page shoot out the printer and I remember binding my book together with card board for the cover and string to hold the pages together. Great memories.

Fast forward to my teenage years. At 17, I became a mother and decided to reevaluate my career choices. Instead of being an English/Journalism major, I decided to go into the science field. Better opportunity for a single mom was my rationale. I lasted 1 semester at Ole Miss as a biology major and decided to switch to English and follow my dream. I remember one of my quirky English professors and her obsession with crime and murders. I remember writing a report on the child killer Albert Fish. According to her, my paper was good enough to publish in one of her graduate school journals.

I moved to GA after my freshman year at Ole Miss, never to return again due to the reality of moving to a new state and an unstable home. I had a toddler, 2 siblings, and 3 adults depending on me to take care of the house. My dreams of writing faded with each passing day until I never thought about writing again.

Until 10 years later. It was this time last year, that I decided to start writing again just for the sheer pleasure of it. I had finished college, was in graduate school so I was used to writing for assignments. But after doing my Sunday to Sunday in town mission trip, the writing bug hit me. So I started this blog.

About 2 weeks ago, I took my small group to Daystar Church's prophetic ministry night. We all had appointments to basically have someone give us a prophetic message from God, whatever it may be. I was blown away. The people in the room spoke about things that had been weighing on my heart, they described my personality and desires to a tee. God was pleased with me and the Devil feared me. I was told that God has called me to deliver people from bondage. I was called to set the captives free...Isaiah theme chapter that God put on my heart last year.

The she said it. She told me I was going to write books which will help finance my ministry. I was speechless. How did this complete stranger know anything about my desire to write? She told me that God says I will write He truly knows the desires of my heart because lately, I have been saying I would love to have a career where I could just write for a living. No experience writing professionally what so ever but I know its something I enjoy. God was tapping on my heart strings with that prophetic message.

Then tonight happened. As I was getting ready to head out to support a friend's fundraiser, I got a text message from a friend from church named Justin. Justin and I really only speak at church but don't hang in the same social circle. He sent a message saying he wanted to "clear up a few things." I was nervous cause I had no idea what that meant. He called and started talking about the fact that he was glad that I reached out to him about my interest in writing. Justin, by the way is a published author and coaches other up and coming authors. So imagine my utter shock when he starts talking about being excited about me wanting to write. My mouth was wide open because I HAD NEVER EVER TALKED TO JUSTIN ABOUT WANTING TO WRITE!! NEVER!!! Where was this coming from?!

We continued to talk like I had actually reached out to him for advice because I couldn't dare say that I had no clue what he was talking about. My heart was racing because I knew it was all God. He was setting this all up for me. Justin was giving me great advice and pointers about how to start my writing off. In the mean time, I was trying to balance my friend's 10 month old and her diaper bag on my hip, while walking up a hill in the heat to get to my event but I was taking in everything he was saying. He invited me to come to a Christian writers conference tomorrow which I had already known about and kinda wanted to go but was hesitant. Yeah, I will totally be there.

For the next few hours, I kept trying to rationalize what had just transpired. Me, a writer. By the time, I got home to put baby Eden to bed, I was so overwhelmed with emotions. Just last night, God changed my plans for my small group lessons just minutes before we were about to start. He gave me Jeremiah 29:11 and I had my group discussing God's purpose for each of us and how we should take those first steps to start living that purpose out now. As I sit here writing this, God is telling me that I have wasted enough time and now is my first step. I am getting just a glimpse of what He has called me to do and its so overwhelming, I feel like my brain is going to melt. He knows me well enough to not give me the big picture all at once because it would probably scare the crap out of me. But He has given me this small snapshot:

Write. He will give me the words. Just write.

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